Wednesday, February 8, 2012

On Being Collins' Mommy: First Year Reflections

In lieu of his FIRST birthday tomorrow, I thought I'd reflect back on the best year of my life. :)

1. What was the single best thing that happened this past year?

I think Trent and I would both agree that it's the birth of our incredibly healthy Collins. He's turned our world upside down and we love that our family has grown by a little person! If I could mention one more thing...and I's the immense growth in my faith. I've talked more to the Lord this past year than I ever have and I am so thankful for this refreshed and powerful relationship with the only one that knows me in and out. :)

Right before we headed to the hospital!! 2.8.11

2. In the last year, what has been challenging?
...writing my resignation letter to Fayette County Public Schools. Challenging, but not hard. I knew what I needed to say and I knew that this was what Trent and I felt in our hearts, but the challenge came with trusting the Lord 100% that this was 'our' plan. It's been challenging. I miss teaching and I constantly wonder if I'll ever be a principal. Why do I do this?!
Trent's taken on a new job where he travels weekly (to cover my missing income) and I miss him. A. Lot.
It's challenging when I hear or read other's opinions on staying home vs. working. It tugs at my heart and I feel like I've prayed SO MUCH on this topic. I've come to realize that I'm a good mommy, because I'm me. Not because I don't work. Not because I stay home. Just because I love Collins and would do anything for him....that's why I'm a good mommy. I don't think someone's a better mommy because they stay home or go to work. It takes a lot of sacrificing either way and I respect whatever choice us moms have to make. It's not easy.

Month One MILK Party!

3. What was an unexpected joy this past year?
When Collins first stood up in his crib. I walked into his bedroom to pick him up from his nap, and there he was!! Posting up in the corner! It was the sweetest moment and I will never forget what his eyes were telling me...."Look Mom! I did it!"
Month Two SMILE Party!
4. Pick three words to describe the last year.
Complete. Exciting. Joyful.
Complete: A wholesome feeling. Hard to explain, but I just feel like this is where I'm supposed to be and this is what I'm supposed to be doing.
Exciting: Having a child completely changes your outlook on life. There's a reason to look forward to each new day and there's a reason for me to be my best every day. Every new day is exciting!
Joyful: Even in the toughest of mommy moments, there is utter joy. Temper tantrums have worn me down at moments, but it's the hugging, cuddling, and kissing afterwards that fills my heart back up again.
Month Three GOOGOO Party!
5. What do you love about being a mommy?
Being relied on. Feeling those little hands hold on tighter when we go up the stairs, seeing those arms reaching out for me, feeling those kisses that are meant for only's quite the feeling. He knows I'll take care of him and I like knowing that he knows that.

Month Four ROLL Party!

6. What was the most enjoyable area of managing your home?

Funny question, but I can answer it easily!! :) So, I've always despised laundry. Well, now I have a partner and it's way more fun! Collins LOVES the laundry room and enjoys opening and closing the washing machine and dryer doors. We talk a lot while I fold laundry and it's our special time. He will throw his magnetic letters into the wash, so I have to watch carefully. He thinks it's so funny!

Month Five TOE Party!
7. What was the scariest moment of the past year?
I have a squirmy baby. He squirmed right out of his bumbo seat and fell a good 3 feet. I know we all have these moments of where we feel like the most awful mom in the world, but this one stuck with me for awhile!! When I look back on it I still get chills. I hate talking about it! Mom and I rushed him to his pediatrician and he was perfect. Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord. Praise the Lord. I'm thankful for a husband that didn't scream at me and knew it was an accident. An accident that I'm thankful turned out to be ok. But, heart left my body when he fell!
Month Six TEETH Party!
8. What are some personality traits of your little one that you see forming?
He's a goof! He knows how to charm people by winking...he's a flirt. He's extremely loving. He wants to be held and he always wants to be by people. If I leave the room, here he comes! He's stubborn and strong willed...his way or the highway. He's a hard worker. He will stay focused on some of his toys or books for a good amount of time.
Month Seven UP Party!
9. Now that you have a baby, do you look at your husband differently?
Trent's a very compassionate person. He's a home body, a lover of sports, spiritual, and super driven when it comes to work. He loves his family and especially his baby boy. Trent just shines in my eyes now. In everything he does, there's purpose. I'm sure it intimidates him that he's our sole provider financially, but you'd never know. I appreciate what he does so much more now and I'm so thankful that he's such a giver of his time, love, and energy.  He's an incredible father and I think this helps him balance all he has going on. I just think he's the best. I went to a funeral this past week and the son of the sweet lady that passed mentioned that she thought the world of her husband. He hung the moon. Ditto.
Month Eight CREEPY CRAWLERS Party!
10. Would you do this all again?
In a heartbeat. We're praying for the guidance of when to grow our little family. I love the three of us, but I have always wanted a big family. I want a loud home. One that oozes with laughter and unconditional love. My biggest hope for my children is that they grow up loving the Lord and eachother. I want them to be best friends their entire lives.
Month Nine HIGH FIVE party!
11. Has your little one changed who you are as a person?
I think both my actions and my inwardly thinking.... My actions have changed in that I am doing now what is best for Collins. It's not about me. It's what's best for the family. Thinking wise...I am constantly thinking of what to do next, how to please Collins, what to make for dinner, when Trent's dry cleaning is done, etc. I think my mind runs 20 miles a minute. But, I'm content with this and love providing for my family. I'm on my toes more and am awaiting Collins' every move.
I do look at life with a whole new light. This little baby has given me so much joy, love, and patience. :)
Month Ten GATE Party!
12. What advice do you have for new moms out there?
Have fun. Take lots of pictures and hug all the time. Love your family and don't worry about being the perfect mom. Sometimes in our weaknesses we find out who we really are! Read a mom's devotional bible and let your baby touch and feel your bible. Sing songs and dance!! When Collins gets married someday and we're dancing the night away, I hope he remembers our silly kitchen dances together. :) Pray with your family and forgive their mistakes!
Month Eleven SPICY Party!
13. What are your wishes for your child?
That he grows up knowing the Lord, loves and treats others well, feels comfortable coming to us with anything, works hard in school and in life, and that he knows how much he is loved.
In about 6 hours from now (9pm) on 2.8.11 we were headed to the hospital! What strong emotions I have! Just so thankful for this beautiful gift we've been given!


  1. Thanks for the good cry!!! :) Beautifully written. Happy birthday Collins! It's a flood of emotions for Mommy, though, isn't it?

  2. OK, no lie, I am crying right now. I love how you set this up and may have to steal this idea in a few months. I've loved watching you be a Mommy. It is so hard and you do it with such love and grace. It's hard to not be jealous of what a good Mommy you are to your sweet baby boy! :) #9 is the one that got my eyes teary! It completely changes everything and I love that you see how you and Trent have changed but together - not apart. Your Mommy one, man on man, I struggle with this on a minute by minute basis. That is the truth, sadly. I love that you are so at peace with your decision. I hope one day I can be at peace with me working right now and I hope that one day I will feel like I'm a 'good enough' Mommy for having to work. Anyways, sorry for the long post! I'm excited for Collins' party on Sunday, but mostly, I'm excited to continue getting to be a part of his life and watching him grow with you!!!

  3. Great post Maegan. Love the picture of you shortly before you headed to the hospital. You're gorgeous everyday, but in that picture you're simply stunning! The excitement and joy of what's to come radiates from within you.

    I love the teeny tiny party hat Collins wore for his one month birthday The month two picture where everyone from your side of the family is surrounding your little man and loving on him is precious. The month five photo is another favorite.

    Wishing you a happy Momiversary and Collins a very special 1st birthday. I know all of you will be blessed with wonderful memories and time together.

    Amy F.

  4. Beautiful post! As a new mom something I needed to read. Happy 1st Birthday to Collins!

  5. Love you guys!!

    Sara- So many emotions!! I just put him down for bed and couldn't stop squeezing him! Being a mommy is the best, but there are such hard moments! :)Hope to see you soon!

    Meg- I can't thank you enough for being there for me while Trenty is gone. :) It meants a lot! Know that I think you're an awesome mommy whether you're working or not. That does not matter. Harper is lucky to have you!

    Melissa- You are going to be such a great mom! I've loved following your sweet journey and your monthly pics! Keep us updated! :) He's too cute!

  6. Amy- Thank you so much for always commenting on the posts. I'm so sad that I missed you when you were in town. I hope you know how much I appreciate your sweet words. Love you!

  7. Loved reading this!! So sweet, brought tears to my eyes! I just love that you will always have the memories of all his monthly birthday parties! That is such a cute idea!! Can't wait to see his bday pics I know you will make it so special! Happy Birthday Collins!!!!! :)

  8. Happy Birthday, Collins!!! This was such a sweet, reflective post!